Of all the terrible things in my life, most of them never happened. I was bullied a couple of times as a child. Nothing physically violent, but the imaginings these events inspired sure were. If you could calculate the amount of time spent in my head, ruminating over what had happened and/or worse, planning my […]
A family is like a mobile. You know, the fragile, suspended, moving sculpture you might hang over a baby’s crib. The kind that gently moves with the breeze. In the family of an alcoholic or addict, this mobile is named “Dysfunction.” This mobile is inelegant, some pieces taking on much more than their share of […]
I am a fortunate man, I have a swimming pool. One recent windless morning I dove in, the surface perfectly still. Underneath, I began to rise ahead of my wake. Opening my eyes. I could see almost nothing of the outside world; however, I could clearly see the reflection of my hands and arms on […]
I heard it said not long ago that it’s my duty to make recovery attractive. That impacted me on a number of levels. I have a great life, I really do. Working with families, people in early recovery or those who still suffer is a poignant reminder to me of how good my life is. […]
Recovery. For me is less about learning how to be a better person and more about letting go of the things that keep me from my Higher Power. There’s a saying in my program, “We’re not bad people trying to get good, we’re sick people trying to get well.” That rings true for me. Although, […]
Work kept cutting into my alcohol abuse. I didn’t really have much going on in my life, other than drinking, and work. For a long time, I was pretty good at both. I never lost a job or even got in trouble due to my drinking until I tried to get sober and slipped… lol. […]
I can do a lot of stuff. I’ve learned how to do a lot of stuff and I’ve taught myself to do a lot of stuff. If I decide to get something done, more often than not, it gets done. I set fairly high standards for myself and typically live up to them. I don’t […]
I’m a construction guy. In construction, the more you’re able to produce the better you are. Any time spent not producing is wasted time. I was taught early on to “Hurry every chance you get,” and “Blow and go.” It’s actually why I was well suited to construction, and vice versa. In fact, it’s indicative […]
I was recently reminded by a friend how cunning and baffling this disease is. Specifically, how easy it is to forget what works. To stop using the tools that work. It’s easy to forget I need them. To remember how bad it was. To remember to notice how good it is. To continue with this […]
COVID. What a trip this 2020-21 period has been. Tragic, and great. Frightening and peaceful. Enriching and sad beyond measure. My recovery has given me the peace of mind to not make a mess of this unfortunate time. That’s a blessing I cannot put into words. How profoundly gratifying is the knowledge that, during this […]